Category Archives: Life

Give to the people of Haiti

Update: The Red Cross has now pledged $10 million in aid, and the “Text Haiti to 90999” campaign has raised over $2 million for the Red Cross in 24 hours.

Today I urge you to donate to Doctors without Borders, a nonprofit organization that sends medical professionals and equipment to provide care in areas that need it most. The Red Cross is now estimating the death toll may be 45,000-50,000. Many of Haiti’s hospitals were destroyed or severely damaged in the earthquakes, and the ones that are still operational are overloaded. Doctors without Borders is in Haiti providing medical care, but they need funding to offer the best possible care. Please send whatever you can afford to give.

According to the American Red Cross, more than 3 million people in the country are affected by Tuesday’s 7.0 earthquake. The photos of the rubble show the capital city in absolute ruins, including this shocking image of the country’s Presidential Palace. There is no telling what the final death toll will be, but thousands of people are missing or dead. My heart breaks to see the devastation in this already impoverish country.

Please consider giving whatever you can today. I chose to give to the American Red Cross, which has already released $200,000 in disaster relief funding. Here is a list of organizations offering disaster relief in Haiti. No amount is too great or too small.

The cure for a case of wanderlust

Tony and I have spent a good deal of our young lives being responsible. We save our money instead of spending it. We take short weekend trips instead of traveling to exotic far-away lands. We spend our weekends at home watching movies instead of drinking at bars with other 25-year-olds.

I’m not complaining. This is the life that I want, the life that makes me happy. There’s only one thing about it one thing I would change: I want to travel more.

Neither of us was very responsible with money in college, but we didn’t travel, either. We didn’t go on extravagant spring break trips or study abroad. It remains my only real regret about the way I handled my education.

Now that we’re so close to finally settling down, it’s made me think a lot about this one aspect of young life that I feel I missed. I know that we’re still young. We still have plenty of time. But I also know how much will change.

Because we know what’s coming, we’re trying to pack a lot of young living into a very short time. It’s why we decided to go to Europe. It’s why we spent much of the summer taking short little trips to the beach and the mountains.

All of this is to tell you that Tony and I did something a little crazy last week. We booked a 3-day cruise to the Bahamas. We’re setting sail in just 52 days — roughly two months before the week that we’ll move and board a plane for Europe.

We paid in cash, and we can absolutely afford it even with the trip to Europe and the move coming up. And yes, we got a very good deal.

We can afford it because we spent the last three years hoarding money, saving as much as we could for what will come once we arrive in Indiana. We’ve worked hard to put ourselves ahead of the curve when it comes to our finances. It won’t hurt our long-term goals to make a few spontaneous decisions in the short time we have left as a married couple without children.

I’m not saying that we’re going to spend the next few months blowing our hard-earned savings. I’m well aware of our limits and our goals. But we’ve got a little extra money, probably for the last time in a long time, and I intend to have a little fun with it. The important thing is that we keep our goals in mind, and we enjoy ourselves without getting too far off track.

We plan to pack a lot of living into the next few months. :)

Photo by rednut

Yes, I’d like some cheese with my whine. Preferably gouda.

You know those dreams where you’re being chased, but you can’t get your feet to move? And when you try to scream, you discover that you can’t? And you know whatever is chasing you is coming, but no matter how much you will yourself to just keep moving, your body and your mind just won’t cooperate?

Lately, it feels like my life has been that dream.

I have no reason to complain. In fact, everything is going gloriously. I’m thisclose to everything I’ve ever wanted.

But that’s not what the dream is about. It’s about inertia. It’s about the fear of moving forward. It’s about leaving the safe comfort of what you know to venture out into unknown territory.

I’m no dream analyst, but I can make correlations about this dream and what’s happening in my life when I’m most likely to have it.

The summer before I moved away from home for college, I had that dream all the time. I also frequently dreamed I was suddenly 9 months pregnant, which I’ve read is a dream about the fear of change, too. It should have been the one of the best summers of my life — no responsibility, nothing but opportunity ahead of me. But I was paralyzed with fear.

Just before my husband and I left our college town to move here for his graduate school, I went through a nearly debilitating bout of anxiety. For the first time in my life, I was frequently awoken by panic attacks.

At the time, it didn’t feel as related to the move as I know it was now. It wasn’t necessarily thoughts about moving that triggered the attacks. It was daily life. A spilled glass of water, a setback in plans, a traffic jam that left us scrambling to make our movie in time. The most trivial little things would lead to the worst kind of terror.

Now, as we face another major life change, another big move, I find myself spiraling down that path again. This time it feels a little easier. I feel like I’m right on the brink of the worst kind of anxiety I’ve ever faced — the anxiety triggered by change.

It doesn’t matter that the voice of reason in my head tells me not to worry, everything will be okay, these are all good things. The logical side of me knows that. The logical side of me is excited about what’s to come, excited about all the opportunity ahead of us. But anxiety isn’t about logic — it’s about fear. Fear of the unknown, fear that I can’t handle what’s to come, fear that I’ll fail.

I’m working on it. Every day is a struggle to keep myself grounded and avoid spiraling down the path of panic attacks and insomnia. I can cope. I’ve always coped.

But this time it’s also a little harder in a way, because I know what’s it like to live without fear. For six glorious months after I began combining exercise with anti-anxiety medication, I felt good for the first time in my life. But now that another big change is upon me, those feelings are replaced once again by crippling fear.

The only remedy is to trust myself. I have to learn to listen to that voice that knows I’m strong enough to handle what’s the come just like I’ve handled every other major change. In the end, it will all be okay. But getting there is the hard part.

Countdown to Europe and moving — Four months to go

The end of the holiday season was particularly bittersweet for me. We’re moving and taking a trans-Atlantic vacation in 120 days, and it’s finally time for me to start doing all the things I’ve been putting off until “after the holidays.” It’s so exciting, but overwhelming, too.

I’ve been breaking everything down month-by-month to make sure I get it all done. Here’s what’s on my plate for January.

Moving

Last month I set a date for our move and booked the movers and the truck. We’re renting a U-Haul and hiring a moving company to load up the truck. I don’t know if I’ve written about this before, but honestly, even though loading the truck ourselves would be more frugal, hiring people to do it is the best $150 I will ever spend. We’re on the third floor, and it’s just us. Knowing that two professionals will be here to lug our heavy possessions down three flights of wind-y stairs takes a huge load off my mind.

Just before the holidays I also informed my boss and co-workers that I’ll be leaving in May. My plan was to make an announcement in March, but the other employee in my department is pregnant and due in June. I felt like it was only fair to let everyone know well in advance so they could plan for both of us to leave around the same time.

We’re also continuing to declutter, but that’s not going as well as I’d hoped. :( I’m hoping the New Year will motivate me to really start getting rid of stuff so we can lighten our load.

Europe

For Christmas, Tony’s parents got me a couple of frugal vacation planning books for Paris and London. This month I plan to read through them and make a to-do list based on the tips I find valuable.

Since our flight and hotels are already booked, there isn’t much left to do beyond deciding what to see in the cities and getting our passports. This month we’ll be taking care of the passports to make sure we have plenty of time.

Everything is coming together nicely. Here’s hoping it’s smooth sailing from here to May.

Photo by tahir

Tech tools to help you stick to your resolutions

New Year’s Day is over, and now begins the slow decline in motivation for my New Year’s resolutions. It’s just so much easier to commit time and energy to self improvement when I’m on vacation. Once I get back to work and back to my to-do list, finding the time becomes a lot more difficult, and resolutions are the first thing to go.

Luckily, we live in the age of information technology. If you can make it work for you, technology can make sticking to your resolutions a lot easier. Here are my favorite tools for simplifying some of the most common resolutions.

Exercise more.

This year, my main resolution is to run a half marathon. But I’m not a runner. At all. And I’ve never really trained for a race. So I’m taking the age old advice of breaking my goal into smaller pieces to make it easier to attain.

My first step is training for a 5K in March, and I found a 5K training program called “Couch to 5K” that makes it incredibly easy. By using interval training and breaking it down week by week, this program builds up stamina without burning you out. It promises to prepare you for your first 5K in 9 weeks flat.

To make it even easier, I downloaded the Couch to 5K iPhone app. This is the first application for my smart phone that I’ve actually purchased (I usually only download the free ones), and it’s so worth it. The app tracks your progress and links a timer to your iTunes playlist so you can listen to music while keeping with the program. If you’re hoping to run more in the New Year, I absolutely recommend it.

Lose weight.

There are a ton of websites out there that make tracking diet and exercise a lot easier. Two of my favorites are FitDay and the Daily Plate. They’re both free, and they offer food diaries, fitness tracking, and a community for support. Simple calorie trackers make it easy to identify your diet downfalls, and fitness tracking helps you determine how many calories you’re burning with your daily exercise.

Read more.

I love my busy life, but I really miss having the time to read for leisure. Lately I’ve been using Shelfari to motivate me to keep up with my reading list. In the past, I would see tons of books that looked interesting, but I never had a place to keep a list. Shelfari’s visual bookshelf gives you a place to list what you’ve read, what you want to read, and find recommendations for new books from readers like you. You can see my last 10 reads in the widget on the right sidebar. The rating and reviews feature lets you keep track of your favorites. By making reading a fun challenge, this website may be the motivation you need to become well read.

Manage your money better.

If you’re not using Mint.com to track your spending, this should be your first priority. Mint automatically syncs with your bank accounts and credit cards to give you a full picture of where your money is going. It also allows you to create budgets and automatically track spending based on categories. The free iPhone app lets you keep track of your spending on the go. When it comes to managing your money, this is 75% of the battle.

Get organized.

If you’re looking for a better way to manage your to-do list, try Remember the Milk or Evernote. Both of these free programs allow you to keep an electronic to-do list, sync it with your smart phone or home computer, and stay on top of what needs to get done.

What did I miss? How are you using technology to accomplish your goals?

Photo by dmachiavello

Overcoming the holiday hangover

This time of year is rough for me. After all of the build up around the holidays, the good cheer, the warm fuzzies, it’s hard for me to say goodbye to the holiday season.

January is just so … depressing compared to December. The sparkly holiday decorations are back in the closets, the holiday vacation is over, and all that’s left is three more months of winter. Yuck.

But it’s particularly rough for me this year. I’m at the point in our planning for the move and Europe where it’s too far and not far enough. I’m so excited, and I’m counting down the days of course. But I also feel overwhelmed with everything that needs to get done. I’m excited about the new year, but I’m a little deflated as I get back to the real world. If you’re feeling the same way, here are some tips for staying positive.

Stay committed to your resolutions.

We’re all so motivated to set new goals and start over on New Year’s Day, but once we get back to the real world, that motivation quickly dissolves. But there’s a reason New Year’s Day is exciting and January 4 is depressing. Try to hang on to that feeling of new beginnings. Stay committed to your New Year’s resolution. View every day as a new opportunity to continue reaching your goals.

Revel in relaxation.

As exciting as holiday planning is, it’s also stressful. Instead of feeling sad to see it go, focus on how nice it will be to take a break. Spend a Saturday working on the projects that took a backseat during the holiday season (or starting a new project), and then spend a Sunday doing nothing. You deserve it.

Give yourself something to look forward to.

From the day after Thanksgiving to New Year’s Eve, December is a month of counting down. That’s part of why December is so fun — countdowns are exciting. Hang on to a little of that magic by planning something fun in February or March.

Travel prices are rock bottom, so it’s the perfect time to take a short weekend trip somewhere close by. Last year, we went to Washington D.C. Find somewhere an hour or two away with lots of free entertainment and spring for a night or two in a hotel. A short little getaway will give you something to count down to during the bleak winter months.

How do you beat the holiday hangover?

Photo by stevennl

My New Year’s resolution for 2010 — focus on the positive

Every New Year, I’ve thought long and hard about how to improve myself, and I come up with resolutions that will make me a better person. I tell myself, “You didn’t work out enough this year,” or “You need to lose weight,” or “You need to do this and that to be better.” But you know what? This type of thinking doesn’t motivate me. It just leaves me feeling like I’ve failed in the past, and sets me up for failure and more negative thinking in the future.

This year, I’m spending the New Year looking ahead with excitement and reminding myself of my accomplishments. Instead of dwelling on what I could do better in the coming year, I’m reveling in the joy of all the great things I accomplished in 2009 and the rewards that will follow in 2010.

My New Year’s resolutions are positive reinforcements of my strengths instead of reminders of how I’ve failed. I’m training to run a half marathon to remind myself that I’m capable of anything I set my mind to, and I’m making a promise to myself to focus on my strengths instead of my weaknesses this year.

I want the coming year to be one of happiness and positivity. Here are some other reasons that I’m proud of us, and why I’m so excited for 2010.

  • We’re starting the year credit card debt free, and our emergency fund is complete.
  • We’re finally moving back home to the Midwest.
  • We’re going on our dream vacation to Europe in May.
  • I’m writing a book! (That’s all I can say about that, but I’ll have more details to come, I promise!)
  • My best friend and sister-in-law are both getting married in October.
  • I’m training to run a half marathon in November.

What’s your New Year’s resolution? Are you focusing on your strengths or dwelling on your weaknesses?

Photo by maxblogbits

Frugal year in review – 2009

It’s been an amazing year for us, and I’m so glad I’ve been able to document it all here in this blog.

I’ve picked up quite a few new readers in the past 12 months, so I thought it would be fun to recap the year with my favorite post from each  month (an idea I picked up from Being Frugal). These weren’t necessarily your favorite posts, but they’re the ones that have been particularly meaningful to me.

January: Frugal European vacation — first we need a budget

February: Personal finance is romantic

March: I’ve got a new attitude

April: Comfort & complacency — frugality’s worst enemies

May: Frugality is about quality of life, not money

June: Unexpected benefits of a cash only budget

July: Stop making excuses and start making progress

August: Searching for a place called home

September: Lessons learned from our no spend summer

October: Unexpected benefits of life without cable

November: It’s not failure; it’s an opportunity to learn

December: If at first you don’t succeed, try a new approach

I hope you’re spending today focusing on your accomplishments from this year instead of your setbacks. I hope all of you have a safe and happy new year celebration.

Photo by stewf